By: Kenya Brantley
As a former teacher, I feel it is our duty to teach some people in our community a small, yet powerful, trait – CLASS – Derived from the word “classic” (male gender), or “classy” (female gender).
Men, fellas, dudes, bros: HERBBOXX is not here to preach, but there are some DO’S and DON’T’S. As much as “don’t’s” may not be a word and should not be used in a grad school essay or job report, that’s how much you should NOT do these 3 things. HERBBOXX is not going to say you should not do them, but you show a lack of class if you do.
1. Condoning and participating in a “Sausage Party”. What is a “Sausage Party”? If you don’t know, then you have probably participated in one or many, sadly. If you are over the age of 28, it’s so not cool. A “Sausage Party” is 4 or more guys sitting around smoking. As sad as that is, the “Party” conversation is never about leaving to pick up some women, calling some women over, or even at least venting about their woman/girlfriend. Instead the conversation is about Star Wars, Star Trek, who’s better – Superman or Batman, or some joint they smoked at a festival that had 40% THC, which is bullshit. But that’s what you get at a “Sausage Party”. HERBBOXX employees and associates wouldn’t know if those are the conversations, but we figure they would be something to that nature.
2. When smoking with a female, do not roll a blunt. Don’t get us wrong, when you are by yourself listening to Ghostface Killah’s “One” or Scarface’s “Mary Jane”, that would be great. You are probably wondering what to substitute for the blunt. HERBBOXX will tell you that later.
3. Do not play any music that reminds you of past relationships. Crying and smoking are like texting and driving.
Women, ladies, my beautiful queens: If your main goal in life is to be a TV reality star, these 3 DON’T’S would not help you any.
1. Put up your phone, no one wants to be on your Facebook or Instagram smoking. It’s not a good look.
2. Do not discuss personal dysfunctions during a smoking session. Meaning if you are wanted by the law, have some sexual disease, previously prostituted, had a terrible childhood, or have given the voices in your head nicknames, do not discuss these things when smoking with others.
3. Just like #3 on the men’s list, no one wants to hear about your ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend. We’ve heard it at least 100 times. “She’s a bitch, she’s a whore, and you hate her.”
For right now, this may be a lot to digest for some, so we’re gonna take this class, no pun intended, very slow. So, we look forward to our next meet and greet where HERBBOXX will line out the “DO’S”, or what we like to call the “Bud Commandments”.